Seeing Goals From A Fresh Perspective

Ok. Who has set a goal, fully committed and gone for it, only to fall off the wagon within a matter of weeks (maybe months if you’re disciplined AF)? Be honest …

I have! And I’m certain most (if not all) of you have too. I mean, the fact that only 8% of people will make good on new year’s resolution speaks volumes, right?

So, I got thinking about WHY that is …

Either the goals that we are setting are not truly aligned to our desires and purpose, OR the plan to achieve said goal is fundamentally flawed.

Let’s address both.

The typical model of goal setting (which works for SO many people - me having been one of these people) is this:

  • Define goal so we can fix the things in our life that are not working.

  • Make a plan that involves working backwards from said goal.

  • Set check-in points so you can celebrate mini milestones along the way.

  • Schedule in weekly time to commit to executing the necessary skills for the goal

  • Take daily action steps.

Truthfully, this can work - when the goal is in alignment with our heads and hearts. So, why then, are there still so many of us that are failing at achieving our goals!?

Here’s my theory:

WE ARE SETTING GOALS TO FIX THE THINGS THAT ARE NOT WORKING IN OUR LIVES, instead of working towards dreams, desires and our heart-centred purpose or vocation. Plainly, we’re setting the wrong goals! At least, I know this has been true for me.

Did you know that 77% of goals right now are built around fixing health problems? And, 20% of goals are set to clear debt?

When we come from this negative frame of mind (which is often unconsciously negative) to set goals, it’s not surprising that we fail. When we have a “when I achieve X, then life will be better, and I’ll be happy” mentality about our goals, we are already starting on the back foot. Let me give you an example ...

When it comes to goal setting, we so often create goals from what is going WRONG in our lives, such as; ‘I’m 15kgs overweight, so my goal this year is to lose weight.’ - the unconscious thought could look something like, “when I’m thinner, then I’ll love myself”, or “when I lose weight, then I’ll be happy”, “when I lose weight, then my sex life will improve”, “when I lose weight, then my beloved will show me more affection” … you get the picture.

Some others I see a lot (I’m not immune to this, by the way - I’ve failed A LOT with this method):

“I’m going to start a business so I don’t have to go back to work because I don’t like my job, and I’ll make good money and I’ll be happy”.

“I’m going to work really hard this year and clear my debt, so I’m not stressed and then my marriage/happiness/finances will get better”

It’s so often a “fix this - get that” situation, and that just sounds like such a NEGATIVE and uninspired way to set goals, right? I certainly don’t think that’s what dreams are made of.

So then ...

What if we set our goals based on what we wanted to create and generate in our lives, instead of what we wanted to avoid experiencing and feeling?

What would that feel like?

I read this book by Brendon Burchard, and in it, he asks some questions that blew my freaking mind when it comes to setting epic goals:

3 years from now, if I was living my dream life and I was making my dream difference, what would I have to be able to do THEN that I am not yet doing confidently and at a world class level?

These are your new goals. They are made from a place of positivity, desire, vision casting, and pragmatism. I doubt that “clearing debt” or “losing weight” would ever come up, right? That’s not to say that it won’t be a part of the journey along the way, but we need to start thinking beyond our current story and experience in order to live a life of purpose and truth. (I’ve got a rad vision creation meditation available for you, if you need help with this, by the way)

What are the major skills and qualities that I need that would have to happen for me to accomplish my desired goal?

This is your opportunity to brain dump all of the skills you need to develop more fully to live out the vision you created above.

And, what do I need to do NOW to become confident and world class at those things?

This is the gateway to figuring out what needs to happen in your life today in order to get the dream. Your answers might include tasks like researching, gathering information, brainstorming, data collection, etc.

Where and who will provide the information, tools and practices necessary, for me to become world class?

So, how are you getting better and learning the necessary skills? It’s one thing to have a goal to speak on stages in front of thousands, and then go ahead and wait for the opportunity to pop up. Its another thing entirely to prepare yourself so adequately with the world class skills to be prolific at it, that when the opportunity presents itself (and it will), that you’ll absolutely SLAY.

When we set goals from a place of what we want to fix (or NOT feel e.g. I want to clear my debt so I don’t feel stressed, or I want to lose 10kgs because I don’t like the way I look), we shoot for what is currently possible within our existing mental and physical conditioning, and thus, we always set goals below our potential and what is possible. My favourite book on the topic of reconditioning the mind is Breaking The Habit Of Being Yourself by Dr. Joe Dispenza.

I want to make this super palatable and implementable, so let me give you one of my examples (yes, this is a real goal of mine - with a much shorter timeframe than 3 years, by the way):

3 years from now, if I was living my dream life and I was making my dream difference, what would I have to be able to do THEN that I am not yet doing confidently and at a world class level?

I would have to be able to present to an audience of 10,000+ people confidently and world class.

What are the major skills and qualities that I need that would have to happen for me to accomplish my desired goal?

A clear, concise and consistent message that is unique to me

Consistent experience presenting to big audiences

World class and confident public speaking skills

World class presentation development skills - how do I masterfully create a cohesive, emotional and concise message that is well received?

More knowledge and practice at the art of body language

Consistent production of content to gain a committed following.& strength of message

And, what do I need to do NOW to become confident and world class at those things?

Schedule & invest time in learning the skills

Practice every single day - online or face to face

Research the relevant courses/books/programs/resources for these topics

Select live events I would like to attend so I can learn from the best

Research and select events that I would like to present at & imagine this with my eyes closed daily

Where and who will provide the information, tools and practices necessary, for me to become world class?

TED book on public speaking

Studying my favourite speakers

Visualisation meditations by Dr. Joe Dispenza

Brendon Burchard 90 day public speaking course.

Attend live events to learn from the best

High performers spend 60% of their week on these needle moving tasks that they know will move their goals and projects forward. This example is but one of many of my goals, and as you can see, if I’m truly committed to achieving this goal, I’ll get a good look at what is needed on the daily to achieve it, I’ll get in and start doing it, and I’ll be so freaking prepared for when my opportunity to speak in front of more than 10,000 people presents itself.

The first step is obviously casting the vision for your 3 year goal (or 2 years or 5 years, or whatever works), so I’ve created a visualisation meditation that will help you get into your heart so you can access what your dream life and dream impact looks like. If you’d like a copy, either send me a DM on the gram @iambrittanyeastman, or shoot me an email requesting it here. It’s something I created for my business partners, and it’s a collection of practices that I’ve learnt over the last 8 years, formed into one cohesive practice. It’s super personal, so I won’t share it publicly, but I’m so happy to share it with those that are goal-getters.

I’d love to know how this sits with you, so tell me over on the gram - DM or stories is perfect. Go get ‘em, girl.

Brit x

Brittany Eastman